{off topic} The Rock and the Ripple

Purpose. 
I had my purpose for going to Cambodia and I will just go ahead and say it, I thought it was a darn good one. Leading up to the trip my heart was growing more and more towards protecting children from trafficking. I just knew I had to do something to help and I was elated that I actually found a way to do something about it instead of just dwelling on it even though I had no idea how I would be able to help in a medical setting. Ultimately that didn't matter, I knew I would do what was necessary. At first I was assigned to do height and weight checks for all patients but somewhere along the way I was moved to registration. This ended up being such a huge blessing because I learned a valuable lesson; MY purpose does not trump HIS purpose. 

I started the week strong and happy to help in any way that I could but by day 3 I was a wreck. I was struggling to find the connection between what I was trying to accomplish and what I was actually doing. It is known that the leading cause of trafficking in Cambodia and other third world countries is not being able to afford medical care but I wasn't seeing it directly and a big part of me was left wondering how I was actually helping to stop it. While I was sitting with everybody that came through for help I was totally unaware of their circumstances. What brought them there beside their illness, if they had jobs or homes, how many children they had, if they were considering selling a child to get help or even knew it was possible. And lets face it, these are not exactly questions you can just ask somebody. 
I was lucky enough to have reinforcements though. Friends, many of which I was just getting to know, to help lift me up when I needed it most. 

Me and Kim

That third day there was a little boy. I struggle to remember his age, he was about the size of a two year old but the children are so tiny he could have been 5. When his mother brought him to our table I noticed right away that he was lethargic. The only thing his mother told us was that he had diarrhea and was vomiting. We sent him along to see the doctor and my heart went with him. I could not get this little boy out of my mind. I struggled so much with not knowing what was happening after he left our table. And that is how I felt all week. Not knowing. I was blessed to be sharing my duties with a young girl named Victoria who has an amazing heart for God and his children. Without me really having to say anything she always managed to find time to sneak away and check on the people that touched me in some way, and I'm not even sure she realized it most of the time. This boy was no exception. I found out from Victoria that this little boy had Typhoid, had not been able to eat anything in 5 days, and he had already seen a doctor and was sent home to die because he was too sick. I think it goes without saying that I completely lost it. I took a break and was lucky enough to have Kim to lean on and pray with while I was trying to find strength. Our group, however was there on Higher Authority, and was not giving up as easily as the previous doctor. Several people gathered and prayed over the boy before treating him with fluids and within 30 minutes he was responsive again. I do believe a miracle happened before us! The boy and his mother stayed a couple hours to monitor him. I got away for a few minutes to see him and just sit with him and praise his healing. They left with him eating and walking, when just hours before he could barely open his eyes. It was encouraging, to say the least. 

Me and Karen

Even then, it wasn't until a couple weeks after we were back home that I finally had that "a-ha" moment. That it clicked for me that I wasn't there for MY purpose. My dear friend Karen shared an illustration of a rock creating a ripple in a pond and that we were the rock. A-ha! We were that rock. We created those ripples. We may never know where those ripples lead but we created them. And that was His purpose for me being there. I may never know if I directly prevented a child from being sold, but He does. Two years ago, that would not have been enough for me. Today, it brings me peace. 

These wonderful, beautiful, strong women held me up that week and I will never forget it. 

Kim and Karen

Sau-Pon, one of our translators, and Victoria

Be a rock. Start a ripple. Give it to God. Start another ripple. Let's do this!

{flashy} "Hey Girl" Photo Challenge

Perhaps its because I am not quite done sharing about my trip to Cambodia (you wouldn't think so considering I have yet to blog about it since the first time over 3 months ago) or that I haven't ventured out with my camera as we are just now starting to see days of sun without rain, but I am again entering in a portrait shot in Cambodia for this months I Heart Faces photo challenge.


In villages filled with children so happy for some extra attention, that leaped in front of my camera smiling to ear to ear, this little girl caught my attention. She seemed to be curious but skeptical of why this big group of people who did not speak her language were spending the day in her village. I took her picture a few times, smiled at her, said "ah-goon" (thank you) one of the few words I learned, and went about my way as to not make her uncomfortable. I saw her a few more times that day curiously peeking around but never getting too close. I admit, I kind of wanted to give her a big hug and tell her not to worry :-)

{flashy} Fix-It Friday #136

It has been quite a while since I have participated in Fix-It Friday over in the I Heart Faces community. When I saw the image up for editing today I knew I wanted to play! Editing my own photos, I often stick to basic clean edits but sometimes it is a nice break to have a little fun with it. I knew looking at this picture, by Angie Arthur Photography, that I wanted to give it a saturated urban feel. 

Here is what I did for my final image, it may look like a long list but each step is fairly basic

Edited in Photoshop CS4

• Cropped
• Selected a portion of the brick wall, feathered to 20px and copied to a new layer to get rid of the small amount of window that was left after cropping. 
• Levels adjustment layer on each channel (you can see my tutorial on this here) 
• Duplicated the background image and set to Overlay blend mode, reduced to 80% opacity and masked back her shirt to bring back some detail
• Duplicated the background image and set to Multiply blend mode, reduced to 40% and masked back the girl. 
• Duplicated the background image and ran a High Pass Sharpen with a radius of 20px and set to vivid light blend mode, reduced opacity to 35%
• Duplicated the background image and set to Linear Light blend mode, reduced to 10%
• Selective Color adjustment layer, selected Reds and reduced magenta to -50 and upped yellow to +5
• Gradient adjustment layer with a violet/green/orange gradient, reduced opacity to 30% and masked back the girl at 50% opacity to reduce discoloration in her skin. 
• Flatten layers and save. 

{flashy} I Heart Faces B&W Challenge

It has been quite a while since I have participated in the challenges at I Heart Faces. I have been hoping to jump back in to Fix-It Friday's but it looks like I will start with the B&W challenge! I love black and white photos but for some reason while editing my photos I rarely think about doing a black and white edit. This challenge was a good motivator for me to pick some of my recent favorites and have another go at them.

I took this picture at the first village we visited in Takeo, Cambodia as we were setting up our clinic for the day. This photo has reeled me in from the moment I pulled it up on my computer. Most people may pass right by it, but I. Am. Just. Stuck. On. It. The light pouring in from the window. The man's smile. The children anxiously awaiting brand new tooth brushes, which many had never used before. It is a story.

Take a look at some of the other entries!

{off topic} His love is wide

There was a time when this blog was supposed to be about my artistic endeavors. Yes, even cooking is an art. Oh, what good times they were. I started off so strong and then lost all my umph. One thing about me is that I am NOT a naturally creative person. Not in the least. I have always been more logically driven. It just so happens that everything I find passion for, that I enjoy and strive for, involves a decent level of creativity. Since it doesn't come naturally to me I work at it. Painstakingly work at it. At times...err, always...its a slow process. I'm working on that. In the meantime I find it impossible to not share where I am personally. 


When I started going to church, just over a year ago, I wasn't sure what to expect. I had gone to church as a kid but don't recall being too involved. What I never expected was how much it would change me, consume me, fill me with joy. I was seeking to refine my beliefs, and I got exactly what I asked for.

I have had the song Furious by Jeremy Riddle in my head for the last two days. I have heard it in church a couple of times and all I can say is that this song completely overcomes me. One thing, in any genre of music, that pulls me in is emotion. I want to hear it in their voices. To feel it in my heart. And when that happens I am moved to tears without any real knowledge of why I am crying. This song is no exception. The only thing I can say is that it fills my heart with love, and who doesn't want that? And His love at that. 

I came home from Cambodia two weeks ago. I have been struggling with what to post and sat down several times at my computer to do it but the words would not come to me. This song has inspired me. Although I'm still not sure what I am trying to say while I am typing away :)

"His love is deep. His love is wide. And It covers us. His love is fierce. His love is strong. It is furious."

My time in Cambodia was spent helping people that needed to be shown this kind of love. To know that it is available to them, waiting for them. After enduring years of genocide, which is still fresh in their history, their country needs healing. And what better way to heal than with God's love? It empowers us to do more than we imagined possible. 

During the week we spent in Takeo visiting different villages I helped register our "patients". I struggled with not having much opportunity to interact with the people more than I did. They told my translator what they needed to be seen for; I wrote down what he said. But I tried to find moments to connect when words were not necessary. A smile is universal, right? Those small connections were some of the highlights of my days that week. Of course learning a tiny bit of Khmer, their language, helped a little too. 



We saw just under 900 people in that week and I saw many people turned away because we simply could not help everybody. A majority of the people had pretty standard complaints; arthritis pain, toothaches, colds and stomach aches.  There were some that had been dealing with chronic issues for 5, 10 even 20 years without ever seeing a doctor. Whether it was a 7 year old boy that had an abscessed tooth pulled. An 85 year old woman getting glasses so she could read again. Or a 40 year old man being given pain medication from falling out of a palm tree, true story! We brought relief and hope. 

I was met with so many faces of endurance. Of resiliency.


of innocence. 

The children. Oh, don't get me started on the children. They truly stole my heart. Seeing as though I could probably talk about them for hours, I will save that for another post. 

I can only hope that I helped touch their lives as much as they touched mine.